I remember

I remember a time, perhaps in 2011 or so, when nothing was giving me any pleasure. I remember telling someone this and shedding a tear. Then, maybe 6 months later I noticed that, without any change in medications or any new treatments, I felt better. I was enjoying things more and feeling some pleasure. How did that happen? Here I am, feeling sort of the same unwellness as I had experienced before. Only a few months ago, having felt well and strong, I had tinkered with the dose of Nardil, reducing it very gradually down by 3.25 mg, and then by 7.5 mg just to see what would happen. I noticed more distressing thoughts started to appear in my mind. As I was just about to leave on a vacation, I resumed taking 60 mg. The thoughts eventually went away. But since this little experiment on my part, I have not been able to regain that feeling of wellness and stability that I had been feeling. I feel more off-center. I feel more overwhelmed. I don't feel as chirpy and in the mood to socialize. I feel sad at times. Two days ago I increased the dose of the Nardil to 67.5 mg, but I feel like I'm repeating the same thing only to have the same result: no improvement and more side effects. I'm going to go back down to 60 mg. For the last five weeks I have been feeling this way. Will this just pass in due time? I haven't mentioned the other things happening in my life right now. Good things, yet there is a flip side to said good things. I am deliberately ignoring these things. And, in doing so, I'm only telling half the story.

It's time

It's time to evolve beyond the former tagline ("one person's experience, as it happens, of taking an MAOI") and shorten it to be more holistic. Because we are more then the medicines we take and there is more going on than just the medicine.