Nardil, one year later

Thank you Nardil for keeping me semi-stable for the past year, along with accomplice Lithium. Nardil was the medication I started taking just after my last unhelpful ECT treatment. I remember those first few months of a roller coaster of side effects, especially the euphoria. These days, though, I wish I felt some sense of euphoria. The soft downs and rebounds of depression continue, with the average of my mood being a few points lower than I remember. I remember having more spunk, more excitement, more hope more than several months ago. Something broke and I've come down a few steps to a more apathetic state. When I say "spunk" and "excitement," mind you, it is all relative within my moods. It is so difficult to pursue and be in relationships while in this state. But I'll keep plugging away.